Laughter then, as is reflected in the title of my latest and 10th book, “Laurie’s Bundle of Poetic Humour”, and contains no less than 76 of my “Humour Section” poems that feedback has indicated are favourites and the most popular. I think it would be a massive understatement to say that at the moment we can all do with some laughter and light relief from the bombardment of Curse Covid, spiralling fuel costs, onset of dark evenings and winter etc, etc but HEY let’s not dwell on all that, so here is my lead poem inside my “Humour Bundle Book”. So, counting the poem on back cover there are 78 poems, and at only £7.99 what fantastic Cheer OOoooop value!

Laughter

It’s been said that if we try to laugh

The world will laugh with us too,

And I have always believed in this

So will mostly smile in all I do.

Because we must try to laugh at life

Even if we are losers or the winners.

Whether we’re tall, short or maybe thin

Or those who never missed any dinners.

But it does always seem to be the case

That a smile or good laugh is catching,

So, then it makes us feel much better

When our troubles we are despatching.

*


Talking of laughter and humour I must mention the wonderful people on my “humour” book front cover hanging off my Jesters hat in “baubles, bells or balls”, whatever you choose to call them? 

You may recognise my mate Mick S from previous photos, and surely the lovely Liz P of Seabreeze Cleaning & Sandra Da Silva of her Pink Spaghetti P A Services from photos as well.

 The other smiling lady is no less than the sublime Sylvie Blackmore, star of BBC Radio Sussex & Surrey, who actually and kindly “volunteered” to go on my cover. You most likely have heard us talking on her excellent Sunday afternoon show, where I have happily “guested” many times. Thanks to Sylvie and all of you brave “Bauble or Ball” souls😀!


Continuing the laughter theme then, but not so funny if it has happened to you, especially recently, but from my eighth book “Poetic Seeds to Fruition” (a list of all my books is at the end), comes Bogged Down.


Bogged Down


A visit to that smallest room

Where you normally go alone,

Or maybe have a secret tryst

With your precious mobile phone,

Can now be laced with dangers

That can wreak havoc on a soul,

If carelessly or without intent

You drop the mobile in the bowl.


For no matter how quickly acting

To get this important item back,

From its soaking down the toilet

And any motions you now lack,

Will not prevent serious damage

Caused by water, before unseen

And sadly now dawning on you,

For there’s nothing on the screen.


So you desperately try to save,

This minicomputer with its store

Of contacts and information,

Which unhappily show no more.


Now extreme measures are needed

Although some are not too nice,

For common myths suggests it helps

If you smother the phone with rice,

Before wrapping it up very warm

And putting it in the airing cupboard,

To hope for a little miracle of joy

A bit like Old Mother Hubbard.


But eventually with a heavy heart

You now have to accept the fate,

Of dropping the phone in the bowl

And trying to rescue it too late.


For mobile phones and toilet seats

Don’t make a very happy pair.

Thus you have learnt a hard lesson

Not to take your next one there.

Because another phone is needed

To survive in this day and age.

So ensure to take great care of it

And prevent another toilet rage.

*


Our poor mobile phones, as dear to us as diamond rings perhaps, yet we treat them with distain, lose or dop them until we realise just how reliant on these we have come to be, and repairing or replace them is both aggravating and expensive, so take good care with them.


Another much ill-treated or abused commodity are our glasses, again mainly realised when it is too late, as of this next poem, called simply glasses, and again from my 8th book.


Glasses


I can’t remember the time exactly

That I had to wear glasses on my face,

And whilst admitting I didn’t want to

I put them on the required place.


For many people must succumb

To the need of help for their eyes,

And like many things in older age

It should come as no surprise.

But having glasses causes problems

If you don’t always want them on,

Because you may have varying sight

Depending on what part has gone.


Thus if only wanted for reading

You may not wear them all the time,

And just leave them lying about

Which may become a sort of crime.

For if not treating those glasses well

Perhaps leaving them on a chair,

Can have disastrous consequence

If forgetting that they’re there.


So I must admit to some failures

When taking my glasses off again,

If not needing them for a while

And thus began a habitual refrain.

For if taking them off without care

To put them in a nice safe place,

You will soon learn the little lesson

About on your face, or in a case.


Because although it was a nuisance

Going up and down like a fiddler’s arm,

If they were then tucked safely away

They couldn’t come to any harm.


So after ill-treating many glasses

That needed emergency repair,

I began to realise and understand

To treat my glasses with more care.

But I guess because I’m human

I fall into occasional disgrace,

For when all is said and done now

I don’t like them on my face.

*


The good and bad of mobile phones and glasses described in jocular and poetic mode there, but if suffering any of those incidents described, I’m sure you’ll find that it is no laughing matter?


JOKE TIME THEN:-


1) Did you hear about the M & M who went to night school as wanted to be a Smartie?


2) A new local gym has just had to close already. Guess it just didn’t work out?


3) I have only just realised that fish go to sleep on the riverbed!


4) A new exercise for lazy people is called Diddly Squats


After a gap of about two years due to Curse Covid etc, I am again on Hailsham FM Radio this Saturday November 6th with the excellent Simon Herbert at 11am – 12 noon, chatting, joking and reading some poems. Oh, and of course as per there will be a lot of laughter too…


I am now continuing to get more bookings, gigs, dates and arrangements etc to promote and sell all my books, (TEN published in all now and in only about 8 years), so I continue to lead for others to follow, often imitating but never duplicating me, The Psychy Poet lol! My latest book “Laurie’s Bundle of Poetic Humour” was produced by myself and the brilliant James Harvey, my website Guru & Publisher, in about a MONTH. C’mon lol Keep OOooooooop” 🤣


Ted & Beth, YES, we’re waving everyone, especially to the younger element and King Henry the First, (hope you are better young man), and their new Auntie S B too, and shouting out that they have a whole amusing section on them in my latest Humour book! Just HOW could I possibly leave them out? 🐻🐻


Closing now, but as habit is dictating for all you lovers of, and generally loving, romance fans, here is “Rain Dance” from my naked “behind the towel” Book six, “Poet Reveals All”..


Rain Dance

I saw you on the dance floor

And it seemed like it was raining.

We all felt we were getting wet

But no one was complaining,

As you went through your moves

Of your sublime sensual dance.

For everyone gaped spellbound

In their own erotic trance.

For me though it was eerie

As I had seen you in my dreams.

Knowing you would come sometime,

Least that’s the way it seems.

So I felt that you were here now

For only me, and me alone,

And now I had to find resolve

To reap what I had sown.

Because I believed you heard

When I was calling out for you,

Although I didn’t know your name

I knew my dream would come true.

So I stepped boldly forward

And scooped you in my arms,

Relieved to find you dry

As I was dazzled by your charms.

Thus now we are a pair

Though we often become as one,

Brought into a stark reality

In our world of constant sun.

But It’s a wonder how I knew you

From my dreams fleeting glance,

Showing only rain-soaked movements

That made me take my chance.

*


The end of a slightly earlier out Blog then, BUT as ever thank you all SO much for your kind support, comments, compliments and general encouragement, so please feel free to comment at end of this in lol COMMENTS section, C’MON Debbie B, lol try HARDER please 🧡


Thus, as always, The Journey Continues with LAUGHTER, love, romance, Bears and most importantly, YOU guys🧡🧡🧡


Laurie xx


All ten of my books :–


Poetic Views of Life

More Poetic Views of Life

Reviews of Life in Verse

Life Scene in Verse

Life Presented In Verse,

Poet Reveals All (in your world).

Poet Reflects Your World

Poetic Seeds to Fruition

Our World in Verse

Laurie’s Bundle of Poetic Humour

These all ensure my donation to the excellent charity I support, promote and donate to, that being Help for Heroes.

My first 3 books are only priced £4.99 each, with my 4th and 5th bigger books at £6.99. My new 9th, 8th, 7th and sixth books, all bigger are still £9.99. and are for sale on Amazon, book stores or preferably from me ………….. lw1800@hotmail.co.uk Or 07967 355236

I can now also write a “Personal Poem” for you, your family, any event or your business too…….

I also have a Facebook page “The Psychy Poet Laurie Wilkinson”, and a website:- www.lauriewilkinson.com = Please sign/join up absolutely free.


























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